On Monday, I attended a screening of Bobcat Goldthwait’s new movie God Bless America, hosted by Jeff Goldsmith. The movie was great, but what really stayed with me from the whole event was something that Bobcat spoke about during the Q&A session that followed.
After discussing Hot To Trot at length, he segued into how he approaches making his own movies. For years, I’ve tried to balance writing commercially with writing personally. I wasted a lot of time trying to write what I thought would be a really cool vampire movie. I say the time was wasted because instead of staying true to my vision of the rules of that universe, I started to compare it to all of the new vampire movies being released.
After seeing each new mediocre offering, I became flustered and would rewrite my script in fear of it being compared to already produced and released movies when read, should anyone even want to read another vampire script at this point. With each iteration, the script became less about the very original scenario I initially conceived and more about ensuring that the rules of vampirism were unique, but still made sense. It was a fool’s errand, and by the end of it, I hated the concept. What does this have to do with what Bobcat said? Well, during the Q&A, he talked about making movies for himself.
I took those words to heart and felt a new kind of freedom in regards to writing the Old Stud feature, which I had been somewhat blocked on for the last few weeks. I don’t know that my work will ever be “commercially viable,” but I do know that I am more inspired than ever to continue making content that tells a story that’s interesting to me, with characters that I care about.
If I can stay true to that, I’m hoping the authenticity will emanate and people will respond my work. We’ll see how that goes, I guess.